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No. 13: Song (Grosvenor)
"A magnet hung in a hardware shop"
Grosvenor (Leslie Rands) and Angela (Marjorie Eyre) (1932-3)
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| Grosvenor.
A magnet hung in a hardware shop,
And all around was a loving crop
Of scissors and needles, nails and knives,
Offering love for all their lives;
But for iron the magnet felt no whim,
Though he charmed iron, it charmed not him;
From needles and nails and knives he'd turn,
For he'd set his love on a Silver Churn! |
| Maidens. |
| A Silver Churn! |
| Grosvenor. |
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A Silver Churn!
His most aesthetic,
Very magnetic
Fancy took this turn —
"If I can wheedle
A knife or a needle,
Why not a Silver Churn?"
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| Maidens. |
His most aesthetic,
Very magnetic
Fancy took this turn —
"If I can wheedle
A knife or a needle,
Why not a Silver Churn?" |
Grosvenor.
And Iron and Steel expressed surprise,
The needles opened their well-drilled eyes,
The penknives felt "shut up", no doubt,
The scissors declared themselves "cut out",
The kettles they boiled with rage, 'tis said,
While ev'ry nail went off its head,
And hither and thither began to roam,
Till a hammer came up and drove them home. |
Kenneth Sandford as Grosvenor (1961)
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| Maidens. |
| It drove them home? |
| Grosvenor. |
| It drove them home!
His most aesthetic,
Very magnetic
Fancy took this turn —
"If I can wheedle
A knife or a needle,
Why not a Silver Churn?" |
| Maidens. |
Grosvenor. |
While this magnetic,
Peripatetic
Lover he lived to learn, |
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By no endeavour
Can magnet ever
Attract a Silver Churn! |
By no endeavour
Can magnet ever
Attract a Silver Churn! |
They go off in low spirits, gazing back at him from time
to time.
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